Silent Elephants

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Our days flowed into each other. Typing away our best in the daily routine. I couldn’t help but have a sly smile on my face. I don’t know what you wanted from me. I merely tried my best. You were never outwardly hostile to me, but it felt that way. It made me feel like I was the bad guy in every argument. I just wanted to live in peace. I just wanted to find a balance in this world with you as my central pivot. Why is that such a hindrance to you?

I felt the rush of your presence. I hadn’t noticed you come upon me. I had been focused on typing up my report. You just hovered behind me, watching me silently type. The only sounds were the click clacking of the keys and the soft hum of the space heater beneath my desk. At some point I became aware of you, but I made no effort to cease my typing. I needed to complete this project and get out of the work spaces. I had spent too many tireless hours here and it was time to recharge my constitution.

“How much longer?”

“This is my last page.”

“Do you want to meet downstairs when you’re finished?”

“Sure.” I was exhausted. “But only one.”

“You okay?”

“Yeah, this project is just stressing me out.”

“We don’t have to.”

“It’s okay.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’ll be done in a few. I will meet you down there.”

There was something clearly wrong with us, but I could never figure it out. The tension was killing me. There was the silent elephant crowding us out of the room. Perhaps one day it would force us to actually talk about the issues at hand. I guess until then we would continue this pantomime of a life.

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22 thoughts on “Silent Elephants

  1. As a divorced person, I get this. As a single woman, I witness this.
    Hearts close when we fear rejection. Closed we then become to compassion and gratitude for the other.
    May the two of you find a way to get back to the heart. ❤️ I’m working on a duet that touches on this loss.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I’m trying hard to balance keeping the world from spoiling my babies & allowing them to healthily adjust into the world. I’m pretty sure the process is going to kill me. They’re not even in Jr. High yet!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Yes, it is a difficult task. My oldest is 12, and I finally gave her a tablet, but there are rules. She still doesn’t have a phone. Nothing wrong with spoiling them with love & kindness sir! Xx

        Liked by 1 person

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