Sometimes I’m An Awkward Lover

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Sometimes I’m an awkward lover

I try to slap your ass & pull your hair

But I don’t always have confidence

But I’m doing my very best down there

But I can promise you one thing, dear

I will love you and only you forevermore

I may be a gentleman at public events

But I’ll be your pirate behind locked doors

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Revisionist’s History Of Love

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Revisionist’s history of love
A small takedown on the front lawn
Society’s matron’s clucking away
Whispers won’t counteract the dawn
She was an embarrassment of riches
Maintaining a look, polished & dapper
She fell in love with images of marble
Though remaining Fitz’s Lost Little Flapper
Never man enough between her sheets
Circumspect when they found her on the grass
A little more disheveled than she preferred
Especially with that skirt that couldn’t cover her ass

You Know The Feeling

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You know the feeling
You don’t remember what you’re thinking about
You sense something is missing
& you’re racked with constant doubt
That woman is in your dreams
You try, but you’ll never forget her fertile mind
The way she made you feel worthy
The last visions of her fading behind

Tired Of Asses…

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Tired of the Asses & Elephants?
We’re going to storm the gates
No longer to ruin this great land
Taking back society & eliminate hate
We’re going to run them out of town
Never distracted by the suits so debonair
They’ll plead & beg for mercy & our votes
That’s when we have Washington in our crosshairs

Let’s Scale Back The Sass

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Let’s scale back the sass
You’re not hot enough to be this mean
Have you tried respect & a smile
Might result in something you’ve never seen
There’s no need to be this crass
People are much better when being kind
I’m not here to judge or criticize
There’re alternative paths, if you don’t mind
Fine, I’ll admit you have a great ass
But, you can’t always be this bitter & cruel
I’m going to need at least a smirk
Or I’ll be forced to challenge you to a duel

Girls With Their Knee-Highs

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Girls with their knee-highs
Haute Couture, exposed at the side
But don’t believe everything you see
Smashed & forgotten; a murdered bride
Money left on the nightstand
A life shouldn’t be thrown away for such
Winter comes to erase memories
But down here, it doesn’t take much
She was already cast out, with her upturned jugs
A novelty for these professional suited men
They’ve wiped away (ass-print) the glass
Like she never happened, what will you do then?

Dancin’ On The Dew Drops

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Dancin’ on the dew drops
Behind the magic of the unseen
Lettin’ the sun shine through
Another morning light & serene
Duck & dive past negativity
Run free; barefoot on the grass
Soak up all of nature’s joy
I’m gonna go pinch my woman on the ass

 

I’m Just Trying To Live My Life

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I’m just trying to live my life
Extending some gratitude along the way
Showing the people how I can love
For we never know when it’ll be our last day
I don’t always wake up with a smile
But it’s always easier if I somehow do
Grabbing black coffee & my woman’s ass
Together with a grin; I’m gonna make it through

I’m A Red-Blooded American

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I’m a red-blooded American
Aroused by red meat & microbrews
I enjoy my lazy suburban days
A swinging hammock; dreams of you
The Great Dane snoring beside me
Hunkered down in the cool green grass
It’s far too hot for movement
I wish you were here to wiggle your ass